Slender Man (2018) Review
2:16 PM
The Meme Movie
I didn't know too much about Slender Man prior to watching. I'm definitely not a video game lover but it was hard to avoid the Creepypasta hype. Is Slender Man a video game adaptation? a 90-minute film inspired by a meme? Whatever it is, Slender Man is one of 2018's worst offerings. Funnier than it is scary and incredibly dull, Slender Man struggles to be the paint-by-numbers horror film that it tries to be. According to the IMDb trivia section, 'Sony and Screen Gems were reportedly extremely nervous about releasing the film, due to the ongoing court cases and negative publicity...This caused the two companies to release the film with very little promotional materials to it, and did not screen for critics'. This is absolute bullsh*t. It should read 'due to them realising they were about to release a pile of crap'. The Slender Man marketing team did a great job attempting to spin the studio's lack of confidence in the film into something buzz-worthy. It's a shame nobody else working on the film put in as much effort.
The Slender Man myth is creepy. Slender Man (the film) did little to convince me that the hype surrounding the character is anything but a myth. Director Sylvain White's realisation of the character is visually spooky but laughable in all other areas. White does not make any masterful attempts at creating tension. Instead, the audience is expected to feel uneasy and scared instantly after the characters research the monster on Google. It is an unspoken rule of horror films to spend some time teasing the fearful entity (a la A Quiet Place) before it is revealed (Only a character like Pennywise from It can be introduced from the outset). Slender Man appears on screen in no time; there is no mystery surrounding whether the myth is real, it just is. If Birke's script had taken more time to develop the characters and mythology then maybe White would have had the opportunity to slowly tease the dreaded creature.
Slender Man is the dullest horror film I have seen since Rings. Both films expect to scare audiences with a thin concept, inconsequential jump scares and relatable teen characters. At times it seems that White isn't even trying to create scary scenes; the film's jump scares are either cheap and generic or ridiculously unscary. In one scene, Wren (King) is browsing the library for books about the Slender Man myth and starts to hear strange noises. After an overlong build-up, it is revealed that these strange noises are the librarian walking past. This is just one example of Slender Man being anticlimactic, dumb and anything but scary. Hallie (Goldani Telles) walks through a spooky hospital and there is a receptionist typing one raised finger at a time. This is meant to add to the tense atmosphere but instead makes the scene comical (because nobody types like that!). Slender Man plays like a horror parody; the scary moments are silly, the characters are stupid and the monster is underdeveloped. I jumped once during Slender Man and it was at a moment where there was nothing to be scared by. Slender Man is so dull that your mind starts creating its own frights.
David Birke went from writing the script for the Oscar-nominated Elle to writing the screenplay for Slender Man. Likely one of the biggest drops in quality for any writer. Birke's story is convoluted, bland and distasteful. He cannot decide the film's protagonist; is it, Wren? Hallie? Although Birke told the story from multiple perspectives to show the different side effects of encountering Slender Man, everything just became muddled; Wren loses her face in the library while Hallie's date has a distorted face. The third act solidifies Hallie as the protagonist when she is faced with an important dilemma. I get that Joey King is the bigger star but her role size should have been shrunk in order for Hallie to have an effective character arc. Besides Wren and Hallie, there is also Chloe (Sinclair) and Katie (Basso) who are equally annoying. Firstly, Katie knowingly puts her friends in danger by making them watch the cursed video. Secondly, Slender Man shouldn't have even received the group's message because Chloe breaks the rules by speaking. This is where Birke's script lost me; he couldn't even follow his own rules. Chloe is by far the film's most irritating character; she rebels again later on when told not to take her blindfold off. Although Chloe's fate isn't pleasant, I felt no sympathy because she brought it on herself.
Slender Man has proven to be quite controversial. Some have dismissed the film because the myth has supposedly led to real-life casualties. While I cannot judge the film based on external controversy, I do think that White and Birke should have handled the topic more sensitively. It was a mistake to include subplots about suicide, depression and alcoholic parents; subplots that Birke didn't give the time or thought to explore. The characters suggest that Katie was drawn to the monster because of her home life and mental health. If executed well, this could have made for a sophisticated and smart analysis of teenage struggles. Unfortunately, Slender Man is anything but 'sophisticated' and 'smart'.
Joey King has recently become rather prolific, starring in films such as the Netflix hit The Kissing Booth to other low-brow horrors like Wish Upon. Right now is the biggest her star has ever been. King's performance hits all of the cliche notes that the script requires. There are far worse performances from the Slender Man cast meaning by default, King shines. Julia Goldani Telles reminded me of a young Kristen Stewart. No so much the K-Stew that has become Indie royalty; Goldani Telles's performance is more comparable to Stewart as Bella Swan: wooden and emotionless. Chloe's annoyance outshines Sinclair's performance. Taylor Richardson as Lizzie had a brief opportunity to impress but does not deliver. When scared, the entire cast's screams are forced and exaggerated. It's a red flag that the entire cast struggle to act convincingly scared.
Just like it was unachievable to create a decent film about emojis, White and Birke have failed to turn a viral sensation into a cinematic icon. Slender Man's film remains overshadowed by the video game. White's attempts to scare the audience are cheap and lazy. The screenplay is ridden with dumb characters, plot holes and insensitive subplots. Joey King may have killed her hype with one film. Luckily for her (and everyone else involved), Slender Man will become a myth in the years to come; nobody will remember this trashy, distasteful and hilarious horror film (for the right reasons anyway).
Slender Man is the dullest horror film I have seen since Rings. Both films expect to scare audiences with a thin concept, inconsequential jump scares and relatable teen characters. At times it seems that White isn't even trying to create scary scenes; the film's jump scares are either cheap and generic or ridiculously unscary. In one scene, Wren (King) is browsing the library for books about the Slender Man myth and starts to hear strange noises. After an overlong build-up, it is revealed that these strange noises are the librarian walking past. This is just one example of Slender Man being anticlimactic, dumb and anything but scary. Hallie (Goldani Telles) walks through a spooky hospital and there is a receptionist typing one raised finger at a time. This is meant to add to the tense atmosphere but instead makes the scene comical (because nobody types like that!). Slender Man plays like a horror parody; the scary moments are silly, the characters are stupid and the monster is underdeveloped. I jumped once during Slender Man and it was at a moment where there was nothing to be scared by. Slender Man is so dull that your mind starts creating its own frights.
David Birke went from writing the script for the Oscar-nominated Elle to writing the screenplay for Slender Man. Likely one of the biggest drops in quality for any writer. Birke's story is convoluted, bland and distasteful. He cannot decide the film's protagonist; is it, Wren? Hallie? Although Birke told the story from multiple perspectives to show the different side effects of encountering Slender Man, everything just became muddled; Wren loses her face in the library while Hallie's date has a distorted face. The third act solidifies Hallie as the protagonist when she is faced with an important dilemma. I get that Joey King is the bigger star but her role size should have been shrunk in order for Hallie to have an effective character arc. Besides Wren and Hallie, there is also Chloe (Sinclair) and Katie (Basso) who are equally annoying. Firstly, Katie knowingly puts her friends in danger by making them watch the cursed video. Secondly, Slender Man shouldn't have even received the group's message because Chloe breaks the rules by speaking. This is where Birke's script lost me; he couldn't even follow his own rules. Chloe is by far the film's most irritating character; she rebels again later on when told not to take her blindfold off. Although Chloe's fate isn't pleasant, I felt no sympathy because she brought it on herself.
Slender Man has proven to be quite controversial. Some have dismissed the film because the myth has supposedly led to real-life casualties. While I cannot judge the film based on external controversy, I do think that White and Birke should have handled the topic more sensitively. It was a mistake to include subplots about suicide, depression and alcoholic parents; subplots that Birke didn't give the time or thought to explore. The characters suggest that Katie was drawn to the monster because of her home life and mental health. If executed well, this could have made for a sophisticated and smart analysis of teenage struggles. Unfortunately, Slender Man is anything but 'sophisticated' and 'smart'.
Joey King has recently become rather prolific, starring in films such as the Netflix hit The Kissing Booth to other low-brow horrors like Wish Upon. Right now is the biggest her star has ever been. King's performance hits all of the cliche notes that the script requires. There are far worse performances from the Slender Man cast meaning by default, King shines. Julia Goldani Telles reminded me of a young Kristen Stewart. No so much the K-Stew that has become Indie royalty; Goldani Telles's performance is more comparable to Stewart as Bella Swan: wooden and emotionless. Chloe's annoyance outshines Sinclair's performance. Taylor Richardson as Lizzie had a brief opportunity to impress but does not deliver. When scared, the entire cast's screams are forced and exaggerated. It's a red flag that the entire cast struggle to act convincingly scared.
Just like it was unachievable to create a decent film about emojis, White and Birke have failed to turn a viral sensation into a cinematic icon. Slender Man's film remains overshadowed by the video game. White's attempts to scare the audience are cheap and lazy. The screenplay is ridden with dumb characters, plot holes and insensitive subplots. Joey King may have killed her hype with one film. Luckily for her (and everyone else involved), Slender Man will become a myth in the years to come; nobody will remember this trashy, distasteful and hilarious horror film (for the right reasons anyway).
20
/100
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